She’s growing up so fast now. I was putting together some shopping carts online, trying to figure out what she needs for fall, and realizing that I am shopping in the girls section. Not the toddlers, girls. When she crawls in to my lap, she is starting not always fit so well.
A few days ago I was going through old pictures and found some from the fall after she was born. Just three short years ago. She was so small, snuggled up in a sling while I browsed the farmer’s market with my dad. Back then she was co sleeping, napping on the weekends on my chest, breastfeeding and growing bigger every day. Back then, it didn’t seem to go quite so fast.
Now she is learning more every day, and showing off what she knows. She’s picking out her own clothes, giving me opinions about shoes, making her will known to any one who will listen.
Still though, when I look in on her sleeping (in her twin bed!), she still seems small. It makes me wish for the days when she would snuggle next to me while she slept. I know that wouldn’t work, not the way it used to. She is mess of sprawled out limbs when she sleeps now. My weekend naps are as close as I will get, and I know those will soon be gone.
I like to tell people, when she gets snuggly, or tries to get out of trouble by telling me that she loves me, that I am banking them for when she’s a teenager. So I smell her hair, or curl her up in a ball to cuddle, and try to remember every little detail of it. Some day, not that far away, she’s going to tell me she hates me. That is when I can look back at those pictures and remember that once, not so long ago, she slept on my chest, and nuzzled my neck, and was my baby love.