I am respectively asking, before I resort to begging and cajoling, that you quit using this pregnancy as an excuse for your expansion.
You may think that this is a contest between you and my belly as to who can get the largest. You would be wrong.
You may think that you are doing me a favor by some how balancing out my center of gravity issues with your additions to my lower half. You would be wrong.
I’m sorry, really I am, that we aren’t running right now. I tried, really I did. However, if this is your way at trying to get back it me, knock it off. I’m itching, scratching, gnawing at my bit to get out there and run again. I am damn near marking off the days until I delivery this kid and get the OK to get out and exercise again. I promise you that if you just chill the heck out, we’ll do just that. Count down the days until I can get out there running again. Any more weight you put on now just makes that day that much more hard to handle.
I have, for what I hope to heck is the last time, gone out and bought another couple of pairs of maternity pants to accommodate you. My wallet is less than impressed at the number of pants you have made us go through and has registered her displeasure as well. She has volunteered some choice tortures should you not cooperate, and I’m thinking about taking her up on the offer.
In summary, stop expanding and we’ll go running again as soon as allowed.