Heart

Families are just a collection of relationships.  They require work sometimes to stay healthy.

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I worry about M, about her ability to make friends, to connect with kids her own age.  She spends a lot of time outside of the house away from us because of my working full time, so we tend to spend our “not at work time” as just our family.  I don’t often get to see her interactions, but I know the things she struggles with.

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I never made friends easily.  I was the odd duck, the weird kid out. I still don’t.  M doesn’t see me with friends very often, and I worry some time that I’m not setting a good example for her.  Her dad is still friends with his elementary school best friend.  Two of his school friends still show up at our house once a month for old school table top gaming.  I left my home town behind so forcefully that I didn’t even know what college most of my classmates went to.

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Yesterday I got to see M interact with kids she had never met before in a way I haven’t recently.  I sat back as she played in a park, suppressing every helicopter tendency I have.  I saw her play with boys, with girls.  I saw her push a younger kid on a swing.  I saw her take turns and introduce herself.  I saw her pretend and thrive.  I put some of my fears to rest and I know that going in to what is next in our journey with her, that she will be OK.

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Saturday I got a chance to finally see a childhood friend I haven’t seen over a decade.  We were friends in contact, and then we weren’t.  I don’t even remember why it changed.  I just know I missed her.  Our kids, our husbands, all got to meet.  It was brief, too brief, but it was a great reminder that things work out.  I am happy that M got to see one of my friends from when I was younger.

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When we were down at the lake, I let M pick out one rock and one tiny piece of drift wood to take home.  While she looked at the lake I found a rock shaped like a heart.  I held it in my pocket, letting it warm up as I watched her play, as I navigated nervously to my old friend’s house, as we drove home a better family than we started the day.   Heart was the theme of the day.

 

 

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One Comment

  1. Posted September 26, 2012 at 5:33 pm | Permalink

    <3

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